And the word is...

PRESENT.

As in "to be more present."

This word popped into my head after the word "peace" dwelled there for a while.  But after some time I felt like "peace" is something I am longing for not what I need to be practicing.  Soon after I had that thought I had the thought "more peace would be the result of changing something."


So, more thinking, pondering, and then came the word present.  As we drove back home, the thoughts.  What would life look like if I was more present?

If while spending time with Jesus I was REALLY present

If while home with my kids I was REALLY present.

At coffee with a friend I was REALLY present.

Hanging out with my husband I was REALLY present.


Partly because of who I am, an extrovert with three kids. And partly because of where Jesus has us, still getting used to a new life on a church plant.  I found myself less and less present with the NOW and more and more planning and thinking about the LATER. 


LATER included both the little (what was I going to make for dinner?, is Nora taking a morning nap today or not?), the MEDIUM (how many days should Claire do preschool?, who is next for us to host in our home?), and the BIG (will Jesus ask us to do this again?, will my kids MAKE IT?). None of these questions and thoughts running through my head are inherently bad, but rather the fact that I found myself often thinking and worrying and pondering these things all too much in the MIDST of the NOW.


PRESENT for me is about trusting Jesus more...that if I work and living more in the NOW that He has given me....what is next....what is LATER will be MORE CLEAR.

Thus something to give up...something to hold looser...something to trust Jesus in more.  To live in the moment He has given me and to trust Him to lead me in the later.


Jesus has been helping me  work this out now for just 2 weeks, and I can tell you I already see a difference in small ways.  Less hurried, more time, more moments, more Jesus.


All good things.