I have been thinking about this weekend a lot lately. Mother's Day falls on this weekend. This weekend will not be hard for me-it will be fun. My husband will come up with a way for my kids to celebrate me. I will wake up to 3 smiling lives who call me mom.
My journey to motherhood came fairly easy. For whatever reason I was given the undeserved gift of children without much struggle. We have suffered loss along the way with 2 miscarriages in between each of our kids...but each time I grieved, I remember being so grateful that my pregnancy with Blake came easy, and that the girls' came quickly after each loss...I understood that I had yet again been given a huge gift-for in the midst of figuring out how to grieve the loss of life-I got to still call myself mom.
I have been thinking the women I know for whom this is not the case. I know the face of longing to be a mom in a few. Each scenario different-each story is hard, for some the journey is over and they have kids now-but they will never forget the years of waiting, hoping, struggling, yearning. I hope that each woman who has this story is known by someone. Your stories may not be what people want to hear about tomorrow, but don't let that stop you from telling someone, your story is important, you are important.
Mother's Day is hard for those who long to be a mom.
I have also been thinking about my own mom-how I still get to have her on Earth-how we will talk on the phone tomorrow, we will laugh, she will giggle with her Grandkids, how even though this will be the 1st time in 32 years that I won't get to physically give my mom a hug on this day-I have a good relationship with her-she knows that I love and appreciate her. (Her gift will arrive on Monday:) )
This again is not the case for everyone. I know the face of some whose moms have died-instead of celebrating tomorrow, mother's day gives them another day where the grief is a little more sharp and the pain is bit more present. It does the same for adult children whose relationship with their mom is hard and for moms who long for a better relationship with their kids, mother's day reminds them not of what they have but rather of what they don't.
Mother's Day is hard for those who miss their mom's in one way or another. It is also hard for mom's who miss their children.
And finally I have been thinking about the moms who have lost a child, whose baby has died before them. I have a SMALL taste of what this is like as mentioned above. But no idea what it feels like when the pregnancy has gone on longer than 11 weeks or when the child has lived in this world for a time. For these mothers have a face to remember...some a personality to remember...all a loss to remember.
Mother's Day is hard for women whose children have died.
I am not saying we shouldn't celebrate moms-and tomorrow I will love my messy cards and slobbery kisses. I just wanted to take notice that while this 'holiday' will be fun for me-it is not fun for many-some scenarios I probably haven't mentioned I am sure-if you know someone for whom this is the case-take a moment to love them.
